Oh no! (But secretly, oh yes! Time for a madcap adventure!) The gals try to fish Ilana’s key out of the sewer, but their table is ready, so the bike drama gets paused. (And yes, Ilana is the party in both a literal and metaphorical sense.) Just when it looks like they’re about to lose the table, Ilana comes biking to the rescue, looking hot in her butch backup-dancer gear: Nikes, booty shorts, and a cap that says “PERV.”Ībbi hurries Ilana up so they can get the table, and then Ilana accidentally drops the key to her bike lock in a sewer grate. The hostess refuses to seat Abbi until her full party arrives. By the end of the montage, I was so high on life I was like, “Who even needs Lexapro when you can just mainline Broad City?” (I still need Lexapro, though.)Īfter the opening credits, we jump to Abbi waiting for a table at some snooty Soho lunch spot where the hostess from hell basically treats her like: WAIT, WHAT? Did Ilana Glazer just make dropping a deuce look sexy and cool?įrom there, we get into a montage of the brassy besties in all kinds of bathroom shenanigans: getting head, giving head, eating chocolate, singing into hairbrushes, and, of course, getting stoned. We’re in split-screen with both gals sitting on their respective toilets, when llana suddenly lights a match with a wicked grin. The premiere episode, “Two Chainz,” opens with a bang - or actually, it’s more like a plop. I’m actually a high-maintenance Jewess who takes 45 minutes to order at restaurants and can’t poop in public bathrooms! So now that you know everything about me, let’s do this. In a nutshell, I’m easygoing, I’m a great cook, and I live in the present - just kidding. So dab your doob, slam a slice, and let’s get into it!īut first, hello! I’m your new Broad City recapper. Ilana is still a hip-hop horn-dog, Abbi is still a Type-A Trudy, and Lincoln is still the goofy third-wheel to the greatest semi-platonic love story of all time. They’re baaack! The bad babes from Broad City have returned and because Jah is great, nothing has changed.
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